


too legit to quit

by addandsubtract



Category: Jurassic Park (1993), Social Network (2010)
Genre: Crossover, Gen, Ridiculous
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-03-19
Updated: 2011-03-19
Packaged: 2017-10-26 05:39:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/279345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/addandsubtract/pseuds/addandsubtract
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>in which dustin is really timmy from jurassic park. yes, he is prepared for velociraptors.</p>
            </blockquote>





	too legit to quit

**Author's Note:**

> ridiculous. roommate molly and I were watching jurassic park, and we had this conversation:  
> 
>
>> molly: you know what I someone to write?  
> me: what?  
> molly: a story where dustin is really timmy from jurassic park, and became a programmer because his sister is so awesome.  
> me: okay.  
> 
> 
>   
> and then this happened. (basically, I have no excuses.) 

They’re all pretty drunk. Eduardo is slouched down on the couch, head tilted against the armrest. He goes supine and boneless when given alcohol, which is really only a problem to the people sharing the couch with him.

Dustin is fine with this, though, because he’s sitting on the floor. Mark is coding, or something, something involving typing, and also ignoring them. He’s listening to the conversation, Dustin knows, but he’s pretending that he’s not, just in case they ask him anything he doesn’t feel like answering.

“So we know that Mark was born with a laptop clutched in his fucking tiny baby fists,” Chris says, gesturing with a mostly full bottle of beer. He’s standing by the mini-fridge, like he got distracted between getting his new beer and sitting back down. Mark snorts from somewhere over Dustin’s left shoulder, and Dustin leans his head back on the couch to try to get a look at him, but instead only sees the curve of Eduardo’s hip.

“I think you’re exaggerating, Chris,” Dustin says, solemn, and Eduardo laughs.

“And you’re interrupting me, Dustin,” Chris says, with something that might be a sneer if he wasn’t on his seventh beer. “I was saying – oh, right. What about you?”

“Who?” Eduardo asks, and Dustin can see him raising his head off of the armrest out of the corner of his eye. Eduardo looks flushed, and his hair is mussed.

“Not you, you couldn’t tell a laptop from a calculator if Mark wasn’t around.” Chris waves Eduardo off, and Chris is kind of a mean drunk, all told, but not in the way where he actually means it, so they cut him some slack. Well, Eduardo’s feelings get hurt, occasionally, but that’s not very difficult.

“Me?” Dustin points to himself. And then wonders where his beer is. He looks around, and finds it tucked around the edge of the couch, still half full. He raises his arms over his head in triumph, and then takes a long swallow. “What about me?”

“Why are you such a nerd, I mean.” Mark is definitely laughing, now, somewhere, Dustin can hear him.

“That is such an affront,” Dustin says. “Only not really, because being a nerd is awesome. And so am I. And, uh. You should have seen me when I was nine, I was obsessed with dinosaurs.” And he’s not supposed to mention the dinosaurs, but whatever, he’s drunk, and not going into details, really. “Computers are a step up from that, actually.”

“You’re terrible at answering questions.” That’s Eduardo, oddly muffled, and when Dustin looks back at him, he’s got his arm over his face. Dustin has no idea why.

“Fine, wow, I didn’t realize I was such an enigma.” Dustin finished off his beer, looks around for somewhere to put the empty bottle, but there isn’t anywhere, really. He puts the bottle back down. “My sister, Lex, was, like. This twelve-year-old child hacker. Once she, uh, she hacked into the security system of – y’know, it’s really hard to explain.” And he’s _not supposed to mention the dinosaurs_ , wow; he’s drunker than he thought. “Anyway, cool older sister, plus inherently nerdy kid brother, equals computer science major.”

This is definitely up there on the list of stories he’s not supposed to tell. Like, _oh, did I tell you about the time I got electrocuted?_ or _yeah, that sucks, but at least you weren’t stuck in a tree in a car._

“Uh,” Chris says. “Your sister hacked a security system when she was twelve?”

“Now we know who got the intelligence in the gene distribution,” Mark says, dryly, from his desk.

“Wow, okay, I see how it is. I have the least supportive friends in existence.” Dustin salutes the room at large, and Chris laughs, and Mark probably isn’t looking since Dustin can’t even see him, and Eduardo is frowning, because just about anything will make him feel guilty.

“In an effort to clear the air of all misunderstandings, I feel that I should tell you that Dustin is my middle name, and that I’ve been cheating at Halo since halfway through first semester.”

“I don’t think anyone was under the impression that you suddenly got better at Halo, Dustin,” Chris says. He’s finally managed to leave the vicinity of the mini-fridge and is trying, in vain, to get Eduardo to sit up. Eduardo is looking more limp than ever.

“Speaking of,” Dustin says, and waggles his eyebrows. Dustin is a master of the obvious segue. He doesn’t really feel like talking about his past anymore. Lex is awesome, but the whole – park thing was not really at all.

“We’re only playing rocket launchers if you can get Eduardo to take up less space,” Chris says.

“Mark?” Dustin still can’t see him, but he hears him shifting, the wheels on his desk chair rolling over the hardwood.

“I don’t know what you would do without me,” Mark says. Dustin can now see the top of his head rising over the back of the couch, like a curly-haired sunrise. Or something.

“We’d probably have a lot more friends, dude,” Dustin says. “No offense.” Chris laughs, and Mark smiles, nudging at Eduardo with his elbow until Eduardo finally shifts over. For some reason that only works with Mark.

“And now,” Dustin adds. “We game.”

Chris snorts. “You are the biggest nerd.”


End file.
